chowyunsmut:
Or anyone else who has too much time on their hands. I mean, I do, but I don't have a fish. Got a fish? Two? Teach them tricks!

revvoice:
It's official.. the internet was won.

I give up. I know this isn't the weirdest or sickest.. but man did it catch me off guard.

NSFW - Ever - under the cut.

( Read more... )

chowyunsmut:
Did anyone see a big, 8-foot, red balloon today with a number attached to it? If you did, let me know.

They'll still be up for another hour or so.

It's a DARPA thing. GO TEAM FARK.

chowyunsmut:
I do believe that I need to cultivate a Welsh accent to add to my repertoire.

Also, after watching How Clean Is Your House and a couple episodes of Hoarders, I've come to realize that I could be considered severely OCD compared to some of these people. Mother of fuck.

Welsh. I require this skill.

chowyunsmut:
I get my monthly food stamp allotment tomorrow. Can anyone help me go get groceries? I'm low on meat. It's roast season. I needs mah meats.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeat.

Halp?

chevronsha:
The last 2 weeks are catching up to me quick and hitting me hard.

My robes are calling me again, for I am being consulted.

By whom and about what I can't tell and would have never guessed in a million years.

maybe I'll be able to think clearer after a long winter's nap.

G'night!

chowyunsmut:
The President has just announced a program to get people to weatherize their homes. It's called "Cash For Caulkers".

This shit just writes itself, okay?

"Cash For Cock" (something about a male prostitution ring?)
"Ass For Caulkers" (cream pie, anyone?)

I'm sure that you could wrestle up some sort of bukkake thing out of it as well.

Aaaaaaaaaand GO!

(I'm lookin' at you, iamivan)

draseshalen:
I have an apartment. A beautiful wonderful apartment.

draseshalen:
so dont want to go to work today...
uggghhhh............
but yay for christmas shopping!

revvoice:
Is it up - or is it just down on my side?

chowyunsmut:
So. I'm horrified at the idea that I'm becoming slightly agoraphobic and possibly busphobic as well. Been chatting with a person on OKStupid, and after making it clear that I Do Not Want A THING, we decide to meet up for just chillin'. He sends me a few different options. He lives in Culver City, and there's fuck-all for bars near me where we both won't stand out like a sore thumb, so fine. I read through the options placed before me and choose Roger's Exciting Tattle Tale Room. I like dive bars, I despise hipster bars, and I like the karaoke. This place seemed pretty much ideal.

It was.

Now granted, maybe I just lucked out on the night. Seems that all the bartenders (females, 5 of them) were there decorating for the holidays and getting right pissed. This led to them: doing Blowjob shots, putting whipped cream mustaches on themselves and each other, groping each other, rolling around and writhing (ostensibly to the music playing) on the pool tables*, and teasing us with ALMOST red-hot girl-on-girl action. Probably, this doesn't happen every night. Judging from the clientele, though (non-fancy, everybody seems to know each other and get along, am I really still in L.A.?), it seems as though this type of behaviour is not new or strange.

Somebody bought a round of shots for everyone in the bar. This was my first experience with the White Lifesaver. Pineapple jack is involved, but I'm pretty sure there's Buttershots or something as well. In any case, FUCKING DELICIOUS OKAY. And deadly, because one cannot taste the alcohol. It just tastes like caaaaaandy.

The girls were futzing with an iPod to choose their songs, and out of nowhere, DJ Tighty-Whitey stepped into the mix. Wound up dj-ing for about 1/2 hour or so before the KJ showed up. The bartender (Andrea, aka "Dr. Dre") refused to let me close out my tab unless I sang a song. She also wound up buying me a couple of shots.

I sang a song, surprised the person I was there with ("I did NOT expect to hear something like that come out of you" was, I believe, the comment), was allowed to close out my tab, and left. Thank goodness the person I met there (let's call him D.) was a gentleman and offered to bring me home, because I took on way more alcohol than normal and don't think that I could have negotiated the THREE buses it would have taken to get me home.

I did have to text one of my favourite bartenders during the evening to let her know that this was exactly the kind of place I could see her working in if she did that sort of work anymore. Not because of the girl-girl thing, or the excessive drunkenness thing, but because of whipped cream mustaches and the relaxed vibe of the place that still allows for the bartender to RULE HER DOMAIN WITH AN IRON FIST. Seemed like her kind of place.

Anyway, I love this bar, and I would go back any damn time with any one of you to show it to you. Just don't get all crazy, because if this place gets overrun by white belt wearing, emo hair having hipster toolbags, I will be PISSED AS HELL.

Also, karaoke 6 nights a week. Just sayin'.

* Before you get all "gaaah robblerobble" about the blatant pool table abuse, let me assure you that these particular pool tables are nothing to get excited about. "Barely serviceable" was one way I hear them described. So honestly, they suck as pool tables but they're awesome "stages". Chill. You ain't Minnesota Fats.

revvoice:
...made me laugh.

( Read more... )

draseshalen:
So in about five weeks I will be moving to Albany with my very best friend in the entire world.
I can't wait!
I know people are excited because it means I get out from under my family's thumb but truthfully that's not a reason to move.
I am excited because I'll be with Jon. Building a life with a man who makes my world a brighter place.
He challenges me, forces me out of my shell and for those who dont see the shy me dont really know me too well because I am incredibly introverted.
He forces me out of my comfort zone. To face fears and concerns.
He is a little recklace and doesnt care what people think. He has authority issues. He's sometimes got a superiority complex a mile wide.
But there is an amazing spirit within him that I have never encountered before. It's regal and proud and sometimes aloof. But the loyality and the passion and the love within that spirit is an eternal flame. His is a spirit that will not bow down.
I'm more diplomatic. I tend to trust people more. I let them in. And sometimes my spirit does bow although I am working on strengthening it and he helps.
To sum it up we are Bearclaw and Joyleaf. (i realize only elfquest fans will get this)
Two people with such different personalities yet the chemistry and the love is so powerful I feel like only the universe is big enough to contain it.
I look forward to building my life with this amazing man and seeing if we can make it all the way to the finish line together.
And we will no doubt have so much fun living together as hard as it will be because it is always hard living with anyone.
And I am so excited about decorating and making a home for me and my boyfriend and to live in this beautiful apartment that has never been lived in before.
I am excited about my future. Because I finally feel like I have one.
Ive never had this type of support before. Ive never felt like I could go and soar without being alone.
I am going back to school
I am living on my own
I have the best boyfriend in the world and he is the love of my life and I want to spend as long as possible with him.
All in all
My life is pretty fucking great.

samanosukesgirl, posting in tkaneshirofans:

Want "The Jail in Burning Island"? Head on over to YesAsia. They have it again.

It's hard to find, so don't pass up this opportunity have a copy of your own!!

draseshalen:

The closer it gets to moving in with Jon, the more my guard is going up. Becuase I am scared. Because I realize I don't fully trust the love he has for me which I know is immense. He has proved it. There should be no trust issues.

"How could you believe the lie but not the truth?"
"Because it didn't make sense for you to love me."

But there is.

Because the last time I was about to move in with someone they decided they didnt want me. And it has taken me YEARS to get to the point Im at now.
I dont know if I could go through another rejection like that. Particularly from Jon.
Everyone says Im strong but I dont know. That kind of rejection stays with you on some level and I wish it didnt. I wish I could banish that aspect from my mind to give Jon the full package.
I KNOW I have a lot to offer and I can make him ridiculously happy.

The thing is....Ive been alone so long that Ive gotten used to it. I dont know how to share. So Im relearning. My space is so valuable to me and Ive always been slightly territorial.

But I really and truly love this man.
Yeah I know I get crushes easily and all that jazz but Ive really only truly loved twice. And the first ended in disaster and all but destroyed me.
This is the second. This is Desiree Finds Her Mate Take Two.
And its the most beautiful thing I have EVER encountered.
I really truly have a friend and a partner and someone who is on the same wavelength so much sometimes it sends chills up my spine.
He treats me with respect. He's faithful. He is wonderful teacher is a lot of ways.
And hes loved me. Down to the last molecule. He loves me all around.

And Im throwing up my guard like its an inpentetrable force field. John would be like "Desy-girl youre fucking stupid" After a very lengthy explanation of how God forbid I be vulnerable for two seconds.

I dont know how to be someone's partner. Ive really been alone for most of my life. The odd one of the family. The odd one out.

I need to work through this. Jon means so much to me that I dont know how to describe it with words. i have to trust him or Ill lose him. Especially because I have no reason not to trust him. He has proven his medal so to speak over and over and over and over again.

Im so in love that its turned me into a fucking dumbass.

Tab I had reason to be insecure.
Jon I have NONE.

Maybe I am not as over what happened with tab and I as i thought.....

gypsymichaella:

Miles and Taura are now Therapy dogs!!!! yay! they took their therapy dog tests tonight and passed.

weeeee!

Jeanette

revvoice:

COPY AND PASTE:
<a href='http://www.inhislikeness.com'><img src='http://www.inhislikeness.com/filedepot/advent09.jpg'></a>

Once again you can spread your IHL love with the daily updating ADVENT CALENDAR Post this where ever you want. Not only do you get an image that changes every day, but you get to spread the news of your favorite webcomic - IN HIS LIKENESS... ok, that might be a bit presumptuous, but I'm willing to go on a limb with this.

Anyway, thanks guys and happy holidays.

gypsymichaella:

Happy Birthday to Ginagardens Oh Mi Little Admiral, CGC, RA, known to everyone as Miles!

He's two today, and after I do my job interview, I'm taking him to Michelle's for a bath for his birthday. I'm hoping that tonight I can add Therapy Dog to his name.

Weeee..........

jeanette

rodimusmclyre:

Hulu picked up The Greatest American Hero

chowyunsmut:
To rant, or not to rant.

If so, should I do it here, or over at chafedbutt.com, which has been sorely neglected?

I'm really cranky about these assholes who crashed the state dinner at the White House, and feel like I need to vent my spleen, but by the same token, I don't wish to add to the attention that they're getting. No publicity, after all, is bad publicity. But I really really want to tell these people what douchebags they are. So. What say you?

Poll #1492608 To Rant or Not To Rant
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 40

Do I let the Salahis have it?

Do you have another suggestion?